Legal & Safety
You must be at least 18 years old to get a tattoo and provide valid legal proof of age. Some laws allow minors providing signed parental/guardian consent to be tattooed. I will not tattoo anyone under the age of 18 regardless of allowances in the law. Adolescents aren't known for having great decision-making skills.
You must not be under the influence of drugs, alcohol or any mind-altering or controlled substance while getting tattooed. I can have as much as I want.
There are medical conditions that predispose some to risk. Uncontrolled diabetes, hemophilia and prescription blood-thinners are just some of the factors that could deem you an ineligible candidate. It is your responsibility to inform me of any health problems that may compromise your ability to sit and/or heal. If you have one of these conditions you must speak to your doctor and provide written permission. This is for my protection as well as yours. Lying, altering or circumventing a doctor's recommendation is not only dangerous to you but unfair to me. I am at the mercy of what you tell me. Please show me the respect that I show you. If you still choose to disregard this advice and pass out during your session you will awaken to your brand new Smurf Village tattoo.
And finally, it is common courtesy to show up armed with coffee for your tattoo artist. It may not ease the pain, but it will lessen the likelihood of Vanity Smurf making an appearance in your tattoo.
Design & Pricing
I prefer to design custom pieces of art for each client, but I will also work from standard flash or a design/photo you provide.
A non-refundable deposit is required on all custom designs which comes off the total price of the tattoo.
I reserve the right to alter all designs using my own judgment to preserve the quality of the tattoo and ensure the best possible outcome. The entire bible will not look good nor fit on your ribcage. Trust me.
Tattoos containing any text must be checked for spelling and syntax and approved by the client. You will always see it as a stencil before it's indelible. The client is responsible for all mistakes (ie. misspelling, wrong date, etc.).
I will not quote prices for which I have no parameters. "Medium size" and "the length of a piece of string" provide the same amount of information: none.
Prices are discussed once all of the information has been collected and I have determined the amount of time and effort the tattoo will require. My pricing is non-negotiable. Once we agree on a price, please do not ask for additions half-way through the tattoo unless you are prepared for Hefty Smurf's wrath. Also, don't ask because "the black is out" if I mind touching up your old tattoo from when you were drunk and lost a bet. I mind.
Payment is due when services are rendered.
The Highlight Reel
Pregnant women should not get tattooed.
I will not tattoo anyone who is sick and/or contagious.
I reserve the right to decline your appointment if I feel your attitude, emotional state or threshold is compromised.
I will terminate your appointment at any point if the situation so dictates. This includes (but is not limited to) sickness/passing out, excessive fidgeting, acts of melodrama and compromised personal safety involving either party.
I am not responsible for any skin defects or tissue variances that may affect the look of your tattoo.
The client is responsible for any flaws in execution caused by the his/her own actions (moving, jerking, twitching, etc.).
Tattoos are final. Any change requests are subject to additional design and tattoo fees regardless of how soon they are submitted.
Touch-ups are free of charge for 2 months after your appointment provided the color loss or design discrepancy was not client-related (ie. picking at it, improper healing, sun/surf, etc.).
Touch-ups from age or abuse are subject to the same pricing policies as a new tattoo.